|
The Off-Topic Lounge APPROPRIATE FAMILY-FRIENDLY TOPICS ONLY - READ THE RULES! This forum is for posting anything (excluding topics prohibited by the forum rules) that's unrelated to email. General discussions, in other words. |
|
Thread Tools |
3 Dec 2002, 04:45 AM | #1 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
Lightbulb Jokes for robert@fm
robert@fm, I know you have an interest in mathematics and logic so I thought you might enjoy these lightbulb jokes:
Q: How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness. Q: How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: If x mathematicians can change a light bulb and if one more simply watches them do it, then x+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb. Therefore, based on this hypothesis, we may infer that for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb. |
3 Dec 2002, 06:27 AM | #2 |
Cornerstone of the Community
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Darlington, UK
Posts: 938
|
Q: How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?
A: We can see no need for uninstallation and have therefore made no provision for light bulbs to be removed. |
3 Dec 2002, 10:55 PM | #3 |
The "e" in e-mail
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 4,681
|
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None — it's a hardware problem. (OK, I know that's an ancient one, but...) |
4 Dec 2002, 10:02 AM | #4 |
Essential Contributor
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: UK and Cyprus
Posts: 399
|
How many Paras does it take to change a lightbulb?
Three. One to do the job and two to tell him how good he is. ============== How many Marines does it take to changes a light bulb? None. Marines are not frightened of the dark. ================= National notes: Paras = Airborne Forces. "change a light bulb" because in UK we use bayonet cap lamps. |
5 Dec 2002, 01:24 AM | #5 |
The "e" in e-mail
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 4,681
|
How many England soccer squad managers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None — the bulb always worked before... |
5 Dec 2002, 04:14 AM | #6 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
Q: How many Classical Economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They believe it would be better if the bulb changed itself instead of having exogenous market forces, i.e., government intervention, address the problem of no illumination. |
3 May 2003, 02:18 AM | #7 |
The "e" in e-mail
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 4,681
|
Another ancient one:
Q. How many behavioural psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb? A. One, but the bulb has to want to change... |
3 May 2003, 03:44 AM | #8 |
Cornerstone of the Community
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: St. Louis, MO USA
Posts: 597
|
A Dominican, a Franciscan, and a Jesuit were visiting a shrine. Suddenly the lights went out. The Dominican stood up and said, "Let us consider the nature of light and of darkness, and their meaning."
The Franciscan began to sing a hymn in honor of our Little Sister Darkness. The Jesuit went out and replaced the fuse. |
15 Jun 2019, 04:22 AM | #9 |
Essential Contributor
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Backup of robert@fm
Posts: 245
|
How many Pink Floyd fans does it take to change a lightbulb?
I don't know, I was really drunk at the time. |
15 Jun 2019, 12:31 PM | #10 | |
Master of the @
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 1,874
|
Hehehe a g00d one!!
Quote:
I think anyway (Yea she told it in the car as they were driving back to the institution) |
|